


The Girls are Legit [The Other Half of the World]

by glitterandlube



Category: DC Comics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-08-06
Updated: 2010-08-06
Packaged: 2017-10-10 23:35:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/105673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glitterandlube/pseuds/glitterandlube
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>You know, I don't write the girls enough in DCU. Partly because girls baffle me, but there should be a reason that Kon, Bart, Tim, and <i>Cassie</i> are all best friends. Please assume this involves my version of the Teen Titans, ie, Cissie, Mia, Zachary are all there. PLUS TIM.</p><p><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gRhPeJ3uzOc">You need to watch it before you read this so it makes sense</a> I need you to picture Cissie and Cassie singing this in front of the entire JLA, Titans, etc...in order for the joke to work.</p>
    </blockquote>





	The Girls are Legit [The Other Half of the World]

**Author's Note:**

> You know, I don't write the girls enough in DCU. Partly because girls baffle me, but there should be a reason that Kon, Bart, Tim, and _Cassie_ are all best friends. Please assume this involves my version of the Teen Titans, ie, Cissie, Mia, Zachary are all there. PLUS TIM.
> 
> [You need to watch it before you read this so it makes sense](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gRhPeJ3uzOc) I need you to picture Cissie and Cassie singing this in front of the entire JLA, Titans, etc...in order for the joke to work.

The Teen Titans throw a party to celebrate the approach of Summer because they already pulled the 'day that ends in Y' party gag from Wendy the Werewolf Stalker. They invite most of the Super Heroes in an attempt to get them all to talk to each other and stop being massive dicks. It's the Teen Titan way to attempt the impossible and pull it off.

They wait until everyone is in the main room, and Kon says, "Okay, live entertainment first." He points behind him to where Cassie is getting her guitar and sitting down on a stool. Cissie walks over with a tiny microphone, and says, "First of May?"

Cassie nods, and grins. She starts playing, and they sing what sounds like a lovely Snow White inspired song until it gets to the part about fucking outdoors. Guy, Booster, and Ted immediately start cheering. When Cassie and Cissie look at each other at the line, _you're going to like it when we're taking each other's pants off_, the volume in the room increases by about 30%. They finish, and both bow to a lot of whistles. Ollie yells, "That's my girl!"

Superman says, "Um, that was rather spirited," as the Titans are all yelling really loudly. Roy says, "Aww, that's my little sister."

Wally adds, "I always did wonder why Bart and Kon liked Cassie so much. Other than she can beat them up."

"Never underestimate the appeal of that." Bart says from behind Wally. Wally looks at Donna and replies, "Oh, I know."

"I think we set the tone of the party correctly." Kon says, "Everyone go have fun now. The closed off rooms are not for guests. That means you, Green Arrow. If we find you drunk and passed out in anyone's bed, we're putting it on the internet."

Behind him, Rose asks, "Since when does Cassie have a sense of humor?"

Jaime says, "I don't know, but that was awesome."

Cassie walks over to the food, smiling at people who are still laughing at the look on Superman's face. Hal Jordan walks over, and smiles at her, and she stares up at him as he gets closer.

"Hi, I'm Hal."

"I know."

"You're Cassie right?"

"Yes." She answers as she looks for Kon, then thinks better of it, and leans over so Hal can look down at the shiny gold W on her shirt. When his eyes glance down, she takes his hand, and says, "I've always thought the Green Lanterns were fascinating."

Hal brightens up, and says, "We can discuss it further upstairs if you'd like..." but he trails off when she says, "In your dreams, creep," and yanks his ring off and yells, "BART!" Bart appears at her side, grabs the ring and disappears. She says, "Kara told me about you."

Hal asks, "Which one is Kara?"

Cassie says, "You're vile," and she walks away as John says, "Losing your touch?"

Hal says, "Oh shit, she took my ring! Hey!"

John almost chokes to death on his pastry as Hal says, "Where's Wonder Woman? She'll help me."

Guy says, "This is the best party I've ever attended already. Wonder Woman is right over there Hal. Make sure you explain why you were distracted."

Hal looks at him funny, and walks across the room. A few minutes later they hear Diana's voice carry over to them. Guy smiles serenely and says, "Kyle, go find Hal's ring before they give it to Robin, and he doesn't let us have it back."

Kyle says, "Hal can find his own damn ring."

"Just go distract one of the girls with your ass, and they'll give it to you."

Kyle rolls his eyes, and scans for the ring, and he walks over and takes Hal's ring off Jaime, who says, "Hey, I was going to give that to Milagro!"

"She'll get her own later." Guy says loudly. Jaime smiles. "Awesome runs in my family."

Kyle returns the ring to Hal and says, "Don't hit on underage girls." Rose steps in Kyle's path as he turns away, looks him up and down, and says, "I'm only a little underage, but you won't care."

"I'm gay. Very, very gay." Kyle says quickly. Hal says, "What? You're not..." while Kyle continues, "Yep, I'm an artist, and it's a requirement. Excuse me."

Rose says, "Goddammit."

Roy says, "I didn't know Kyle was gay. I guess that answers some of my questions about why Connor doesn't seem that interested in strippers."

Dick says, "I'm pretty sure he was just trying to get the hell away from Rose."

Roy nods, and then yells, "HEY KYLE ARE YOU FUCKING MY LITTLE BROTHER OR WHAT?"

Kyle looks horrified, and backs into Jason Todd, who says, "Huh, if I knew you'd suck my dick, I might have been nicer."

Kyle says, "Guy. Guy, get over here and beat up everyone."


End file.
